poor lil clabbered chirrin

My kids watch a lot of tv.

That being said, I do try to make sure that they watch the "classics" so that when they are 20 they can call themselves "cultured". (as in, polished...or sophisticated... not as in clabbered...or curdled.)

We typically aren't the type family to stick a movie in the player and watch it on repeat until we can recite it word for word. (Unless it's Tangled)

So the movies that we watch are all slurped up and thrown into one big melting pot in our minds...

The result being that we sometimes confuse characters and plot lines.

Not sure what exactly the combination here is...but this is what I heard today:

Graysen, just ran through the room singing, "I'm off to see the lizard...the wonderful lizard of Oz!"

Poor chirrin... their cultural references are all blurry.

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A day in the life of an Egyptian...

"This is the face Pharaoh made to Moses and Aaron when they asked him to free their people."

"I've decided there should really just be one Pharaoh...here, you be a peasant."

"Hey, hey! Take my picture while I dance around like a crazed Egyptian!"

"Oh, these pictures are going to come back to haunt me!"

"Uh, Mom. Egyptian boys don't pose for pictures. They battle crocodiles and throw rocks at girls and...stuff."

"Homeschooling is exhausting. We need rest. And juice."

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Ancient Egypt

There's a new pharaoh in town...she's sassy and sweet...she likes chicken and dumplins and pink nail polish...her hobbies include playing Rapunzel, dancing like no one's watching and picking her toes. People are calling her "the new Gift of the Nile".


Look out Ancient Egypt...here she comes. Pin It

Confession: Cinderella meets Rocky

Today is the first day of (real) homeschooling at the Morgan house!

Beginning school with my children has triggered a sort of (painful) nostalgia, a (horrifying) set of memories from my own regrettable glory days.

I was a teensy bit...unstable...in my teenage years. Like a burrito in a microwave.

Oh how I now dream that I was once Rory Gilmore...grossly responsible, goal oriented, mature beyond her years...

But the past is the past, and I think to some degree, everyone fears the memories of their adolescence...right?

Because I love you, and you're good to me, I am going to brave the retelling of a horrible incident in my past. This is solely in the interest of nurturing our growing relationship.

It was my 11th grade year, my year to be presented at the local "club" for white middle class families, and I was high on life and too cool to go to any boring presentation rehearsals.

I showed up (late) to this cotillion, where I met the jerk of the century my date.

Just to give you some context: this was the year of formal cornrows too...you know the slightly thuggy, really awful, tightly pulled rows of hair, that ended with a big mass of curls on the back of your head. Really awful. Your probably wincing right now, just picturing it...

Anyway, so having been too cool to go to rehearsal, when it was my turn to be presented, my date and I stepped out into the bright lights of the country club and sweat-ed nervously as the announcer read off my information. He finished, and my date and I each took a huge step...in opposite directions.

We stopped and looked at each other...nervously grinning at the large number of well dressed people watching.

We visibly struggled back and forth for what seemed like an eternity, as people in the audience began to snicker.

"What are you doing!?" He whispered violently, through gritted teeth.. Finally, my date and I took off down the isle toward the back of the hall (and the exit)...as we should have.

Who knew a teenage boy knew how to walk through a presentation? I mean, really.

We reached the foyer and he quickly ditched me, calling me a moron. Jerk...I didn't want to be your date anyway.

You think that is the worst of it, right? Nope.

Just as the last family entered the foyer for meet and greets, my family approached me.

I stood there, humiliated and teary-eyed...yet, oozing with faked apathy and rebellion. Pshhh...embarrassed? Me? I meant to do that! I'm a rebel! In fact, I'm headed to the bathroom now to burn my bra and smoke a cigarette with the other rebels...

They weren't buying it. The jerky, not-really-a-family-member, older brother figure was there also, being the biggest antagonizer of all.

He just wouldn't let it go. My mom, sympathetically told him to shut up.

But at that point, I was done.

I lifted up my frilly, white, strapless dress in one hand, and reared back...gathering strength from the tips of my glass-slippered toes, to throw him the hardest right hook that my tired, uncomfortable, humiliated body could muster.

Blam.

He grabbed his jaw with an expression of total shock, before bursting into a fit of uncontrollable laughter. He loved it! Masochist.

Two little girls standing at the legs of the family next to us, all dressed up in their Sunday-best, stared up at me with huge, wide eyes and open mouths. Both of them completely unable to believe what they had just witnessed.

A few nearby fathers quickly and quietly escorted their families away from the poor, volatile, twitchy, wily-looking, Cinderella.

I quickly ran off to the bathroom where I cried and sucked my thumb for several hours before surrendering myself to the sympathies of my dear, loyal friends.

As an adult, I comfort myself knowing that we all have stories like this in our pasts.

Don't we? Hello? (crickets chirp) Anyone?

(Use the comment box to tell me about a particular memory you'd like to delete from your past.) Pin It

Thrifty Table and Buffet

While you are waiting in suspense for my fabulous new blog-look to happen, check out this table that I picked up at the little "junk" shop down the road!

The owner cut the price and threw in the matching buffet for little to nothing, nice Jewish man that he is! (Also because he thinks I am the best thing since sliced cheese. He tells me so every time I go in- in a sorta flattering, but mostly just disturbing kinda way.)

The table and buffet were both stained with a light oak(maybe?) colored stain and were very old, and as my cute husband likes to say in a nasally-voice, very "Natchez-y". But, when junk shopping, it is SO IMPORTANT that you don't look at what it is, but what it CAN be. :)

To turn this thrifty little find into a nifty little "distressed" Morgan-family table, I started with the basics: white primer. I then took a dark brown acrylic paint and covered most of the surface area(only letting the white primer show through in spots and streaks where I thought it would look like a neat "accent".) **To recreate my look here, pick a brush stroke direction and stick with it! You don't want this thing lookin like your 4 year old painted it. Then I took a "robin's egg blue" and a cheap brush and made one-way brush strokes until I was happy with the amount of Brown (and white) that were showing through. Then I finished up with a coat of Polycrylic--a water based sealant. Nifty, right? I chose a distressed look for our table because the style can take wear and tear and only look better. Plus, having a 4 year old and a two year old, most of our furniture ends up distressed anyway.

So here is the buffet: You can see the distressed look much better in this picture.

Score one for my pocket book...and my dining room.

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The Manic Blogger

This poor, poor blog...

Just as soon as it lies on the cold, hard floor of the interweb all shriveled and dying, I bombard it with unnatural amounts of love and affection.

Two posts in one day! Ye ole blog, my friend, I've now filled you up so that you are sloshing over with Callie-isms...sigh.

Store up! For I probably won't touch you again for weeks...

Anyway, I have just discovered freezer cooking and I wanted to share it with you! Especially my busy mommy friends. This. is. amazing! My life is instantly less stressful.

Though, you are probably more on the "up and up" than I am, so you probably already have a freezer full of stuff.

But if you don't, check this out. You can spend a day in the kitchen and take the whole next week off. Here is a recipe for you that I tried this week:

Breakfast Burritos

a dozen eggs

shredded cheese

onion, bell pepper, red pepper,

ground sausage (substitute bacon or chopped ham)

10 white flour tortillas

Okay. Brown sausage. Drain. Set aside. Saute onion and peppers. Set aside. Throw your eggs in a skillet and start scrambling. When they are almost done, add peppers and onions. Cook until done. Then mix in sausage and shredded cheese. Salt and pepper to taste. Then, put into tortillas. Fold sides in before rolling up. Then Roll the breakfast burrito in a paper towel, then foil. Stick in the freezer. To eat: Heat in the microwave for 1-2 minutess. Amazing right?? And they taste great.

I am really not a get-up-at-the-crack-of-dawn-to-roll-out-homemade-biscuits-kinda-girl...so this is life changing for me. Seriously. Try them. They're great.

The hubs dips them in salsa. (gag)

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Ouch!

Unfortunate discovery of the day: Zealously grating cheese does not produce warm and happy thoughts....or thumbs.

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